I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
You know shits really hit the fan when you start using public bathroom air freshener spray as perfume
what? where are you?
You can't hold me to anything I said last night; I was drunk on orgasms.
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
Randomize
