ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
I got fingered by sexual harassment panda last night, by a van, I can't remember if he took off his furry panda hands...
when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
is it sad that i can describe this night as "the night that i was sober" and we all know which night it was. like literally one night of sobriety.
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
A little boy in a bathroom stall just shouted "mom where's your penis?? Is it inside you?"
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
My parents worry about me having parties when they go on vacation. Umm no it just means I'm drinking and smoking alone on the first floor of the house instead of the second
Hashtag Pathetic
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
Randomize