are you looking for your table cloth? Cause I found it around my neck this morning...
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
FUCK... Pulled a chick from the bar went to her house passed out on the shitter. She lives in a house full of girls. They were making poop jokes as i left
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize
