He just sent me a dick pic with his iPod held up next to it and the words "in relation to iPod." Geekiest booty call ever.
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
Just put a sign on a baby carriage that says "all daddy wanted was a blowjob" might get fired.
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
Well I squeegeed the puke off your arm at the gas station
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
Also, I'm going to yoga because I have a Taylor Swift range of emotions right now.
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
Randomize