I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
Mike and I just ate the lobster we found in the toilet
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
There are taser marks on me. Your face flashed before my eyes when i woke up and saw them.
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
One minute you were celebrating, the next you were bleeding all over your Nikes.
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
You gotta own your makeout pics Matt. They're like badges of honor
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
the person she was housesitting for had a christmas card from charlie sheen on the fridge so we fucked on the couch and just slept in the bed
Randomize
