So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
Exact words that were just spoken as she was on her 6th, yes 6th piece of bread: "I'm only eating the soft and chewy inside of the bread-I am taking the crust home to feed my turtles"
Wow, im gonna be a great doctor..."hi let me save your life but first check out this pic of me deep throating a handle of grey goose"
Honestly bro, I can't look at girls you've banged. Its like looking herpes in the face.
I feel like a monkey keeps fucking me in the ear with a trombone as a dick.
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
We just won 1800 at the casino and are going to the strip club. Who gives a fuck if it's 5pm
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
Randomize