Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
You're not invited to the wedding. They don't want you starting a "who's fucked the bride the most" contest.
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
Did you rob me and blame it on the strippers?
How many strippers in the world do you think have had a debate with someone about the NRA?
Man my junk looks like a mangled grapefruit right now, this shit sucks.
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
God I need to stop before there's a picture of my dick on my mom's phone.
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
Apparently swingers are magnetically drawn to me?
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
so all I remember is hig-fiving the cop and then sprinting away. considering I'm not in jail, I count that as a win.
Randomize
