I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
You came back with puke all over your sweatshirt and started doing darth vader impressions
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
If you don't let me come over I'm gonna call you on speaker and you have to listen to her scream and moan too
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
I will consider today a failure if my nipple isn't bitten at least 😂
Oh is THAT how we're gonna play mini golf
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
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