I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
Woke up next to a half eaten California burrito. It was tucked in.
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
I just woke up on an unfamiliar floor, my shoes are gone, my suits covered in red lipstick and chocolate, and Im wearing sunglasses that say "Maid of Honor".God damnit I love this country.
I came home to him frying bacon to put in his beer. He said bacon beer lights, taste the awesomer rockies
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
Randomize
