At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
No I have an idea, I saw you running through the neighborhood at 3am while I searched for my flip flops in a ditch
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
Also there's so much vodka on my breath that if I blew on my fingers my nail polish would fall right off
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
i need you to come over and tell me if you can notice that i'm only wearing a teddy underneath my trenchcoat
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