9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
The cops showed up and one of them got pushed in the pool. When he got out he looked really sad so I got him a towel and hugged him. He arrested all the underage drunkards but me.
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
Fell off the toilet trying to reach to put my tampon in the garbage. Pride hurts real bad.
You left your hot dogs in my dresser again
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
Did I tell you about the swingers? Because I think they're trying to trap me.
Randomize
