i just heard a guy call his kid "Google" in a way that leads me to believe that's his name. this day couldn't get worse.
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
If the EMT's ask later... I had 5 hour energy for breakfast and Four Loko for dinner... It might be important for them to know that
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
Stop thinking your God dude. You passed out. God doesn't pass out...
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
I fell into a manhole last night, so there's that
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
Randomize