So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
And there was a legally blind kid in a ref costume doing surprisingly well at beer pong who was passing out business cards
If I come in tomorrow with a cane and a seeing eye dog it's because I just mixed up my salicylic acid acne stuff with my eye makeup remover
Are you feeling okay?
Right now, not a single thing feels even slightly okay. That hungover.
Dude. Went to buy some jack and sailor Jerry, when the guy at the counter realized it was my birthday everybody in the store including the stoners and the elderly sang to me. Then they gave me shots of moonshine. 21st bday was a success
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
So today was the first day i've been sober since Wednesday according to my roommate!
Bro i just made a pipe out of a mechanical pencil and the top to an eye drop bottle. Does that make me some kind of pot god?
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