fuck the hobbit
what about unicorns?
fuck those pointy horses
dude do u know what u did last night?
do i wanna know???
you totally walked in on some couple fuckin in their unlocked dorm room asking for directions to ur room...
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
The friend zone. He put me in the friend zone. But said he still wants me to suck his dick. I'm in the dick sucking friend zone and I want to die.
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
The bouncer just called me magically delicious... apparently I'm a lucky charm. hollllleeeerrrr!
Randomize
