You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
What do I wear to meet his family/put his dog to sleep? Is there even an appropriate outfit for this occasion?
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
Dude I just saw a beer truck w taps in the side... It's like god heard my prayers and sent me a gift from heaven
You know we have no secrets, right? I mean, you saw me shitting in a gift bag drunk and naked on Christmas eve.
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
My roommate just threatened to kill me with my own pan. Can I ever get away from the crazies?!
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
Randomize
