how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
just smash crush and snort whatever we can get our paws on
I knew I fell for you for a reason
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
She's walking to the bar while holding a fifth of fireball, talking on the phone and puking like its nothing out of the ordinary
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
Her handjob consisted of slapping me in the balls. I am never hooking up with her ever again ever.
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
Honestly, you can’t tell the whole sorority he has a donkey dick and expect that no one would sleep with him after you broke up
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