is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
Okay the common myth about putting tampons in you nostrils for a nose bleed is busted. It just starts coming out through your throat.
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
Eye surgery went well. Just can't believe it took getting lasers through my eyes to temporarily stop the vivid sex dreams I was having
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
My makeup bag looks like it has lips and wants to sing to me... Too high?
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