Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
Are cops allowed to hit on you if they're in uniform?! Serious question.
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
The girl at the liquor store remembered me as "the girl who pays in hundreds" so she didn't ID me
she filled my toilet with birdseed... i tried flushing it but now it's clogged so she has to come over and fix it because it was her mistake in the first place
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
Maybe I’ll just go to the party as myself
What, a homewrecker?
Touché
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
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