I feel like i just miscarried Jesus's baby...
it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
I want her autograph on my taint
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
I went in to wake you up this morning and you had a condom draped across your throat like a necklace. There were no boys in the house last night, what were you doing?
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
Randomize
