the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
Did we have sex last night?
No. You laid in my bed and I brought you taco bell.
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
Randomize
