How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
I can't wait to hear about your drunken cab ride to planned parenthood at 2pm
If you were awake I would probably ride my bike over, fuck you like a god, leave you in the wonders of life, and bike home
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
The highlight of my night was when you proclaimed that the man standing next to you smelt like grape medicine...
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
Hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking you had a pulse
Note to self: make sure the door is locked before the handcuffs go on.
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
Randomize
