did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. Hello 29...
I got laid and laid off at a conference in long beach all on the same day
Eh. They balance each other out
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
You went into the bathroom, got in the tub with a pillow, yelled "this isn't as comfortable as it looks in the movies" then passed out
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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