i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
my liver gets a handicap on account of the whole being diseased thing
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
I wonder if the fact that I'm listening to the theme from lion king gives my neighbors the impression that im tripping faceeeee
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
dude you know how i got totally hammered and lost my phone at some frat when i came to visit you two months ago? yeah well someone mailed it back to me in minnesota.. with a picture of a cock as the screen savor
I found my wallet. Still have no idea when I put mad dog in my steel water bottle, though...
She drank my rum. I had sex in her bed and didn't wash the sheets. We're even.
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
Randomize
