Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
You guys I wore sweatpants to work today because I simply forgot to put on real pants and I had a weed brownie and a juice box for breakfast. I am not ready for parenting.
At least life still wants to fuck me.
He had the same tone in his voice and look in his eyes that he gets when he says UFOs aren't real.
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
Please tell me why I’m standing naked in the kitchen drinking pickle juice out of the jar & there is a container of potatoe salad with no lid & a spoon in it on the floor 🤦♀️
I guess she found the pillow case full of vomit I hid last night: "Oh my God. Oh my God. In my fucking FRIDGE?! Really? Hope your dick falls off there's puke all over my food. Fucking die."
Dear Andy-the problem is not that I slept with your girlfriend, it's that you didn't know she's a lesbian.
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