Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
Anne I just took two ambiens. I think my body is melting into my blow up bed. Like a stick of butter just slowly melting. And I'm alright. Don't be afraid. I'll be alright.
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
I feel like there's no sexy way to pull 12 condoms out of your bra.
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
Every person I've ever had sex with is in Chipotle right now.
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
Randomize
