oh man you're gonna hate me when you log onto facebook. remember i love you
the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
You gave me your shirt to use as a napkin every time I spilled beer on myself. Before we went to the bar.
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
Randomize
