i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
you tipped EVERY employee at white castle
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
You know you need to take better care of yourself when shaving reminds you of sheep shearing...
There was no eligible dick at the ER. I'm pissed. Looks like "Searching for Strange at the Local Free Clinic" is a no go for the name of our first full length album. On the other hand, I got a dilaudid shot and I no longer feel like I have the worst bladder infection of my life.
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
Just delivered a pizza to a holiday inn and a delivery driver from Me n Ed's walked up at the same time, we both were going to the same floor so we stood in the elevator making small talk about delivery stuff, but a small part of me wanted to deck him, stand over him and shout,"FOR THE HUT MOTHERFUCKER, FOR THE HUT!"
Jesus christ, don't start a pizza delivery gang war.
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
Randomize