I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
my mom just called and warned me someone is trying to serve me, i feel like i'm playing an extreme game of hide and go seek these next weeks
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
dude. i just ate tomato soup with a funnel. we're out of spoon-straws.
I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big
I would makeout with my roommate, but im not drunk enough and she doesnt like bacon fat
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
I just got a text from a guy. The python is ours if we want.
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Randomize
