also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
i soberly give you permission to do that to me when im drunk
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
I decided to let him keep the rest of my good weed as an "I'm sorry for being a drunk ass ho" consolation prize.
You sent me a snapchat of you hugging a beer with the caption "best friend"
You grabbed my arm, said "I need you" in a very concerned voice and dragged me to the other room where you were blasting Evolution of Beyoncé.
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
So, then you thought it was a good idea to dress up like the Hamburglar, buy a bag full of McDonalds hamburgers, go to Burger King and throw them at everyone while screaming "HAMBURGLAR!". At that point there was no stopping you.
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
Randomize
