Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
He was sitting on the bathroom floor, swirling his finger in the toilet singing the Laguna Beach theme song. I don't know whether to laugh or help him.
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
Get your ass over here, we're drinking Patron and watching My Little Pony. Patron and Ponies, do you copy?!
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
You were greeting everyone with " Hi I'm Jess show me your dick" whether they were dudes or not.
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
You know what i hate? I hate when the ppl you drunkenly made out with actually want to talk to you sober. It just doesn't work that way sir.
He tried to throw up into a beer bottle. It was a complete disaster. Vomit went everywhere. It put the Bellagio's fountain to shame.
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