wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
her dad's the mattress king, she's genetically engineered to be good in bed
Drunk off five beers on a Tuesday. I'm not sure which part of that statement is more sad
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
he obviously didn't care that i was sleeping and dreaming about ellen degeneres knitting me a christmas sweater.
I need to shotgun another beer. Where's the machete?
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
I danced on the street to dubstep on a boombox for an hour with a lesbian single mother.
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
Randomize
