He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
I am spending my child support on dildos
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
My roommate just woke up to me masturbating in our room. I figured this would happen eventually.
Randomize
