either we just had an earthquake or I am really good @ masturbating
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
Attention: due to the power outage we will not be playing drinking games and watching the royal wedding. Bring your own bottle and we'll just drink in silence.
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
Life is when you're laying naked in bed, eating Double Stuff Oreos with your boyfriend, blazed as fuck. Happy 4/20.
One of your snapchats was of you with a 40oz of Mickeys and the caption: "Deep Throat back in her natural habitat"
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
People try and tell me I never learn me lesson, well that's a bunch of crap. I asked for Monday off for Superbowl recovery based on my experience last year.
Asking me to suck on my nipples isn't going to make me less mad at you.
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
Randomize
