I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
We attempted to microwave fifteen corndogs in the microwave and may have ruined it. Also there were fake mustaches on all of his appliances...he said he doesn't like drunk me.
Just found out I own a pyramid. Fuck your good grades, I'm living in my pyramid.
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
Duck, Duck, Goose is now the autocorrect, safe for work version of fuck, fuck, loose.
By the time we got to McDonald's you were sharing a Big Mac with a stripper.
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