two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance
Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
I spent all night sexting your girlfriend for you because you were too drunk. You're welcome.
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
I feel like my vagina stays drunk longer than the rest of me. It's always super sensitive and hungry the day after drinking.
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today....
I'm drunk in your building find me and we can have sex.
I think I broke my toilet with my head. There are ceramic pieces everywhere. and I might still be drunk.
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
Randomize
