one day john is going to snap and they are going to make a new show called "john and chainsaw minus 9"
he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
So I'll spare the details, but I think I discovered I'm lactose intolerant. In my sleep. And you'll be needing new sheets.
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
my roommate woke me up with head. more awkward than it sounds.
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
I’m 95% positive I adopted a bunny last night.
You had cocktails, didn’t you?
Randomize
