he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
In my defense, last night's hookup turned out to be my actual girlfriend. That's gotta count for something, right?
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
Okay she just told me to turn the volume down on the fan. What does this even mean?
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
Randomize
