so im in the parking lot of taco bell eating a taco...and some girl just got out of a car and screamed at the top of her lungs "XANEX FOR SALE!!!!" i fucking love Hamilton.
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
I swear to god if you settle for a trump supporting packers fan, I will not acknowledge your children. You're better than that.
I would've fucked Winston Churchill - rode that D like I was going into battle.
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
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