I am too pretty for them to be this angry at me.
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
She only spoke Russian, but she was so gorgeous it didn't matter
Oh. I think she ate all the cake and took our vodka...still gorgeous.
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
I've already agreed to hook up with 3 people tonight, and its not even 2:00 yet... I think this is what the path to success looks like.
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
When the vodka monkeys are playing a drum solo in my skull tomorrow, remind me I tried to sterilize my body from the inside with titos
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
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