Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
In my junk email folder, there are literally 67 messages from Alcoholics Anonymous. What..the fuck.
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
Less talking, more tequila
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
I flushed a potato down the toilet so now we have to live in a hotel.
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