Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
My dad is drinking wine out of a measuring cup. This explains so much.
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
I folded my dollar bills into mustaches in preparation for our trip to the strip club
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
The bouncers found you passed out on the toilet. They tried to move you but you refused and repeatedly shouted that you wanted to go out like Elvis.
Randomize
