No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
i haven't been laid since the bush administration. it's frustrating.
Some advice for success: 1) Go ugly early, it saves you time and money; 2) If you can't pork a princess, pound a pig for practice; and 3) Beauty is only a light switch away.
ur like the dr phil of bizarro world.
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
Apologies for hacking your facebook and posting that picture of you passed out hooked up to the IV...but we were sat with you on the ER floor for 3 hours, it got boring
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
And as drunk as I was I was able to show my mom how to make text italicized in Microsoft word
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
Randomize
