i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
you spent 5 minutes trying to open an empty PBR and kept saying "don't worry i'll get it i've been working out"
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
My ex came to my place while I was gone. Random things he took: snow shoes, my laundry quarters, a decorative picture, all my condiments, the container that held my rice and a sticker off my wallet. Then left a note saying he watered my plants and fed my cats. What. The. Fuck.
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
Did copperhead road at the bar. All the girl next to me did was stare at my glorious bouncing tits. CAN I FUCKING HELP YOU?? I worked hard for these tits.
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
Randomize
