Note to self: When getting ready to leave with a kid in a wheelchair don't say Let's roll
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
Me liking this guy is the best diet ever. Do I want this cookie...or do I want to get laid.
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
He has no idea he’s my boyfriend.
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
What's a professional way to say get your shit in gear?
Randomize