that's an acceptable place to lick
not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
My tub is filled with twinkies which would be awesome if they were still wrapped and not floating in a mixture of bath water and what appears to be vomit.
are you listening to the theme from Jurassic Park whilst pooping?
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
What does it mean when the government shuts down and your boyfriends wife wants a divorce ON YOUR BIRTHDAY?
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
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