I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
The child next door sounds like he's having vigorous sex in the backyard and it's making me very, very uncomfortable. I don't want to look.
I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
I just shotgunned a beer alone in the bathroom...what do you expect from me
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
He's laying next to me passed out dressed as a hooters girl
I bet he's a super pretty hooters girl
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
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