I don't know whether I should be pissed that there's glitter in my bed or proud that there's semen in there too.
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
The nurse who handed me my discharge papers underlined and highlighted do not consume alcohol while on my painkiller its like she knows me.
Note to self: Do not bring gift bag with cock ring inside to family Christmas. Leave to unwrap at home.
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
I feel a little uneasy about having my grandma sleep in my bed that I've banged chicks in not too long ago... Fuckin blizzards
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
Honestly, this social distancing bullshit is giving me a good excuse for drinking alone.
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
