Tell LD happy birthday and party like it's $19.99
Recession joke.
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
In the ER. 2nd degree burns. Drunken attempt to make gasoline scented candles.
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
I'll pick you up. Avoid slightly awkward no-we're-not-dating-but-I'm-still-screwing-your-son-after-2-years parental run-ins.
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
Wait... so you had sex and then your ear drum ruptured? I'm not sure if I want to ask if the two are related...
Randomize
