So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
I'm soaked in champagne. I'm eating oatmeal from mcdonalds tonight was glorious
Well sundance is in town and Im going to use my one and only shot to bang Taylor swift... Does it count as a random if shes famous?
Last night you sang a duet with a gay man posing as a straight man posing as nicole kidman; your life lacks neither color nor texture:)
I spent most of the night trying to drink out of three bottles of beer at once. I don't have to be told the reasons I'm single
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
I just want you to know you're the worst sister ever.
If this is about me and your ex, it's not my fault she doesn't like men.
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
Randomize
