How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
So i guess my mom went into the kitchen and asked me why i was making mac and cheese at 4 in the morning and apparently i yelled at her to "get the fuck back bitch you don't know my life"
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
Nothing like pulling a bottle of vodka out of your purse at 7am in the security line to make your fellow passengers uncomfortable...
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
I figured it out! There's blood on the kitchen floor because I fell into the dishwasher. And there's a face dent. And it doesn't work.
Yea.....I saw that happen.
you tried to strip tease your way into canada but got arrested instead. don't worry, your mom doesn't know.
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
Randomize
